Yeah, we were “relieving stress.” Good God man, we were being men!  College men!  College men drink and do stupid things!  It’s what we’re good at.

And for the record, I remember getting to the train bridge.  Said nerd remembered losing his keys on the way back.

Rolla Police were never as nice as they were that night. 

Also, for the record…

I never ran into a sign pole on the to the movie theater, and you never peed on the propane tank behind Brewster’s.  Also, we never dragged a keg up the stairs and tapped it in your dorm room, spraying beer foam all over the floor.  And I never got drunk at a floor party and lost the capability for speech.  Oh, yeah.  I also didn’t drink Evan Williams/Beast boiler makers and run into my closet door on the way to the bathroom.

Now that these myths are put away, my work here is done.

We were angels.  Hard working academic angels.