January 14, 2006
Today started out a pretty good day... Granted, I informed the tall two-legged that I needed canned food this morning, and didn't get it, but after dealing with his ineptitude, I wandered around, played with my Christmas presents, and found a place to soak in the sun. I knew it wouldn't go anywhere, but I stood by the door a couple of times and politely asked to venture outside. You know, just to keep the requests going. I really didn't want to go outside because it was raining rats and dogs (my thing... who ever came up with raining 'cats and dogs'?).
I was periodically dozing on the bed, and pleased that Daddy wandered in to put Sandy on the bed. She's so lazy that she can't jump on the bed by herself (she claims she's too old), and she proceeded to clean me. I'd finally come to terms with the probability that I couldn't take over the world, and was fine with simply taking over the house. Today my world took a dismal turn.
I'd gotten used to having subtle things change in my life. I found a special place in the area that was under construction to stay warm and cozy. Daddy took it away just to make my live miserable. Something about me lying in insulation... I dealt with that in my typical better-than-that attitude, but the dog has started to annoy me. He has started to venture into the house during the evenings and nights. I thought it would go away fairly quickly because he stinks so bad. He is not really a problem, but he is so stupid I can't sway him to my goals. I walk by him, and swell to twice my size, which is quite impressive, but all he does is wag his tail (which is long as I am) and sniff my butt. Dogs are dumb, and he is the worst. I figured it was temporary until I heard some terrible noises while I lay on my bed (supposedly, Annie's bed... little does she know). Yells and threats were emanating from the bathroom. Could it be that StinkDog was having a real bath?
A half hour later, my worst fears were realized. Clean blankets on the floor welcomed the mutt out of the bathroom. On the off chance that this might become normal, I informed him about what was off limits: my toys, my room (previously known as Annie's room), the room under construction, the kitchen, the dining room... pretty much everything except the ten square feet allocated to him by the blankets. The moron just looked at me and wagged his tail. Just to vent my spite, I sniffed his butt. Two can play at this game.
I'm not sure how this will unfold. Given the difficulty I heard in the giving of the bath, I'm hoping that as soon as he starts stinking again, he'll be out the door. If not, I'll have to change my strategy. I hope he doesn't think he will get cleaning services from Sandy. She's already employed...
Lilo the Cat Tolerant
I was periodically dozing on the bed, and pleased that Daddy wandered in to put Sandy on the bed. She's so lazy that she can't jump on the bed by herself (she claims she's too old), and she proceeded to clean me. I'd finally come to terms with the probability that I couldn't take over the world, and was fine with simply taking over the house. Today my world took a dismal turn.
I'd gotten used to having subtle things change in my life. I found a special place in the area that was under construction to stay warm and cozy. Daddy took it away just to make my live miserable. Something about me lying in insulation... I dealt with that in my typical better-than-that attitude, but the dog has started to annoy me. He has started to venture into the house during the evenings and nights. I thought it would go away fairly quickly because he stinks so bad. He is not really a problem, but he is so stupid I can't sway him to my goals. I walk by him, and swell to twice my size, which is quite impressive, but all he does is wag his tail (which is long as I am) and sniff my butt. Dogs are dumb, and he is the worst. I figured it was temporary until I heard some terrible noises while I lay on my bed (supposedly, Annie's bed... little does she know). Yells and threats were emanating from the bathroom. Could it be that StinkDog was having a real bath?
A half hour later, my worst fears were realized. Clean blankets on the floor welcomed the mutt out of the bathroom. On the off chance that this might become normal, I informed him about what was off limits: my toys, my room (previously known as Annie's room), the room under construction, the kitchen, the dining room... pretty much everything except the ten square feet allocated to him by the blankets. The moron just looked at me and wagged his tail. Just to vent my spite, I sniffed his butt. Two can play at this game.
I'm not sure how this will unfold. Given the difficulty I heard in the giving of the bath, I'm hoping that as soon as he starts stinking again, he'll be out the door. If not, I'll have to change my strategy. I hope he doesn't think he will get cleaning services from Sandy. She's already employed...
Lilo the