After breakfast and "clean-up", I took the girls down to the 16th Annual Boulder Creek Art, Wine & Music Festival. Colleen's folks don't live far from downtown, so we were allowed to park at their house, and walk to the festival. We got a bit of a late start, as none of us had had much sleep, and, well, two of them were five and a half (separated by days), and two of them were thirteen (separated by minutes). Things were just getting rolling at the festival when we got there around 11:00 am.

The first stop was the Boulder Creek Recreational Center, where Colleen's mom works. They had games and a "Bouncy House" for the kids for probably just enough money to break even. The girls spent a while there, having a good time, getting face paintings, and then Annie, Colleen and I went to walk the booths. The twins went with their mom a little later. I really, really enjoy the Festival. I like to see all the crafts and crazy things that people come up with to offer in a 10' x 10' stall. Of course, in keeping with the "wine" part of the Festival, every fifth booth or so is a different winery.

It's so much different walking down the street with two kindergarteners (excuse me, almost first graders) then it was when I would go with Annie's mom, and Annie on my back. The girls aren't interested in looking at the wood carvings, the incredible paintings, the glass work, the crockery, the furniture, or essentially anything that I would have liked to browse. That's ok, I enjoyed listening to their banter at the various toy booths. Some businesses have complained in the past at the decrease in business during the Festival. However, one of my favorite businesses for both selection and service (Boulder Creek Hardware), followed the lead of the Boulder Creek Brewing Company, and put up their own stall. Bravo! They had various toys and small tools, a Spin-the-Wheel for a prize, hats, and I don't know what else as I was focusing on two little girls that just had to have squirt guns. I really hope the hardware store did well, and were able to increase their visibility to the folks that live around here. I did think it strange, though, that the first thing we purchased was from a store that is there every day.

We made it down the first stretch, and began our return on the other side, when the hunger pangs that hit children fast and furious came to light. Colleen wanted noodles and rice, and Annie thought that sounded good as well. Coincidentally, we were walking by such a stall at that exact moment. What are the odds? We got two heaping bowls of Asian noodles and rice for about six bucks. Not too bad given that a bottle of water was typically going for two dollars. I was surprised at how much they ate. At first I considered having them share a bowl, but was amazed to see that both of them almost finished their meals, before we decided to move on.

Colleen's mom and the twins walked by us, and "mom" went to grab something to drink for the girls. They were going the opposite direction than we were, so afterwards we went on, expecting to meet back up at the Rec Center. We passed patiently through the crowd, holding hands and balancing our prized possessions. As we walked by yet another "unique" jewelry vendor, we heard the voice that makes every parent's hair stand on end: a mother frantically looking for a lost child. The poor women was screaming her son's name at the top of her lungs, and giving a description every three feet. My hands tightened about the two angels with me.

As I realized that this day was by no means about me, we crossed in front of the last toy vendor in the loop. The girls were allowed one more souvenir. Colleen chose a little remote-controlled motorcycle (I think that's what it was), and Annie wanted a fake tattoo. Hmmm... best friends wanting tattoos and motorcycles... a shudder just went through me.

Well, we finished our circuit, and headed back to the Rec Center. Squirt guns were loaded, and the game was afoot. After much squirting, and much repeating of "don't squirt other people", the water was gone. We went inside where Katherine painted Annie and Colleen's faces like cats (Annie used all the color's available, Colleen wanted black and white like her cat Chance). Another trip to the Bouncy House, and Annie and I decided to go home. It was about 2:00 pm. Usually, on Monday, the crowds die down, and some vendors actually pack up early. Today? As we left for home, there was still a line of cars for two miles north of town, and people parking wherever they could find the space, or almost find the space.

Why did I go in such depth on this? The Festival is a wonderful place for our town to get together and see each other outside school and work. We see people that we have met through school or frequenting downtown businesses, or work (I guess) . We have a moment to enjoy our mountains together, and the small town atmosphere that drew us all here. We also have the opportunity to share this with people from all over the Bay Area. To my knowledge, there isn't another Festival (and they are very popular out here) that takes place in such a rural area. They are always in urban areas, and perhaps are larger than ours. But I like our Festival. Unfortunately, it almost didn't happen this year. The county was concerned about the alcohol and congestion in Boulder Creek. Let me say it again: the county was concerned about the alcohol and congestion in Boulder Creek. I admit, I probably don't know the whole picture, but come on. Apparently, there is no problem with alcohol and congestion in Santa Cruz or Capitola, or Aptos when they have there own Festival, or any of the other many densely populated areas along the coast in Santa Cruz County. Yeah, the big problem is Boulder Creek - population about 5000 (added some to the 2000 census-was amused that the sites reporting this on the web had Boulder Creek in the wrong location in Santa Cruz County). And we aren't like other towns in the Bay Area. Our population doesn't just merge into the next town. San Jose boasts around 1,000,000 people, but in most directions you don't leave the city boundaries without entering the next densely populated city. No, when you drive north of Boulder Creek, you find yourself in very rural mountain areas where you can go miles before encountering a home near the road. South? A couple of miles will find you in the booming metropolis of Brookdale, population estimated at 1000. The few roads leading east and west will find even more sparsely populated land.

I hadn't intended on having a glass of wine, but rumors abound that this might be our last Festival. The newspaper reported that the coordinators for this year's festival had to fight tooth and nail to put it on, and no one is sure if it will happen next year. So, I bought a glass.

Hopefully, the rumors are wrong, and I’ll be able to report another fun visit to the festival next year. Maybe next year I won’t just be accompanied by ladies over twenty years younger than me.

Proud of my community - the county should support us and shut the frick up

When I was a senior in engineering school, I interviewed with two companies. I wasn't impressed with either one of them, nor were they impressed with me. I require too much. One interviewer was talking to me about antennas, and his company made a very directive, very powerfull antenna array for the government. I asked what it was for, and he said "I don't know". I was done at that point. It was then that I decided to go to graduate school. I wasn't done learning what I could, and wanted to complete the cycle. Even then, I was psyching myself out for a Ph.D.

In my younger years, I was gifted with a phenomenal amount of luck. I was late for applying to graduate school, but my record spoke for itself, and I managed to get two half-time teaching positions, and a fellowship that paid for school.

The following year, I received a research assistantship, and continued one of my teaching positions. I also applied for a National Science Foundation fellowship. I got it. I was surprised. However, I've had the honor of serving on the committee a couple of times that decides who gets these, and I now understand why. My application was great, I just didn't know it at the time.

I continued on through my research grant from NSF, and after many challenges, received my Ph.D. My advisor, who is now a dear friend, actually told me at one point that I should either quit or find another advisor. I said no. We started this, we'll finish it. He has since told me that that meant a lot to him.

I did well in school. I wanted it. I was going to do whatever it took. And it took a lot from me. It was a separate life from the one I have now. Sometimes, I think it was a better life. But, I'm in this life now, and I'll do what it takes again.

The purpose of this rant? I have sacrificed and worked for my degree. I'm proud of it. I've always respected Ph.D.s. I was amazed when I joined industry to find that not everyone else does. I'm crushed that I have to defend myself to various levels of management and coworkers who think that my degree is a detriment. I spent so much time learning how to solve problems, and now that I make use of it (and I do), it's as if it were for nothing. I am sometimes called "the Ph.D." in a tone that is not respectful.

Yeah, well. I didn't get it for them. I got it for me. I'm proud of it. I have a gift for intuitively understanding electromagnetic fields. I have had a ton of math, and still see the need for more. Sometimes we joke about what the degrees mean: when you get your BS, you know everything... when you get your MS, you realize you know nothing... when you get your Ph.D. you still recognize you know nothing, but neither does anyone else. It's funny, but the goal of education is to discover how to learn. There is nothing... nothing, that I can't learn.


David M. Hockanson, Ph.D.

The introduction of the space shuttle paved the way for the recycling era. (If you don't agree, check out James Burke - Connections.) For the first time, the world had a space vehicle that could be used more than once. If you've never seen the remains of a Saturn V rocket, you should. It completely puts into perspective the cost and expenditure of early space flight.

Unfortunately, in most electronics, we have gone the other way. Seven years ago, I bought a DVD player. Last week, it died. I took it apart, and cleaned everything. It still can't see DVDs. It is a single disc player that reads DVD and CD protocols. Maybe I could have fixed it, but it would have taken a lot of time and energy. I went on line and found a five-disc changer for the same money I spent on the original DVD player that could also play a score of other media formats, including MP3. Actually, I think it was cheaper. On top of that it is half the height of the original. I recycle everything I can: cardboard, paper, all types of plastic, glass, whatever. Electronics? I try to find another use for them, but sometimes it just doesn't happen. Wouldn't it be great if we could just find a standard form-factor and replace the guts without replacing everything?

Yeah, well, when the cost of petroleum products gets high enough, we'll change our goals and interests. Until then, anybody want a used DVD player that doesn't work? The laser might make a cool project...

In the sticks, but my sticks conduct electrons...

Don't read this if you don't want exposure to my dark side...

This morning I woke to the sound of one of my favorite songs. Unfortunately, it has been tainted by its use at my second wedding. You see, I have a curse (multiple ones, I'm sure). The two of interest here are: 1) a memory that stores most of everything I see or experience, and 2) being a sentimental fool. So, I thought I'd offer some advice to those who are entertaining the idea of a serious relationship...

Music: If you really like a song, keep it to yourself. At meaningful events, listen to music that makes your eyes roll. This way, if things go South, you can say, "I always hated that song." Otherwise, when you hear songs you really like, you will just get irritated.

Souvenirs: Choose souvenirs carefully. If you somewhere romantic or exciting with your significant other, keep memorabilia simple. Shirts wear out, and are ideal. I suspect plants/flowers would be a good one, too. You can unconsciously let them die. If you choose something truly meaningful, it may trigger memories you'd rather not remember. Lord help you if you do something stupid like buy interesting wind chimes whose sound forces the recollection of a romantic weekend in Monterey. (Anyone want some wind chimes?)

Dining: The moment a restaurant becomes "our place" for dining, go out with just your friends to the same restaurant. I might even suggest getting a little tipsy and rowdy to temper the connection. Otherwise, you may find later that you no longer feel like going to some of your favorite haunts.

Weddings: Just a suggestion: if you find yourself taking the big leap of faith and getting married, do not have the ceremony some place you will see often. My first wedding was at my ex-in-laws'. Perfect. God knows I will never go there again. Choosing a place that is on a path for your normal routines is a definite no-no.

Physical Changes: Don't do anything permanent to yourelf that can be linked to a significant other. See Exhibit A under read more. Thank goodness there are no names on this.

Of course, the alternative is to adopt a psychological profile that doesn’t have any sentimental tendencies. I think virtually all the women I’ve dated since I was sixteen could teach a class on it!

That’s enough exposure to the darker side of my psyche. Contrary, to how this may come across, I’m not sad. Just venting a little irritation with myself.

Back to crackin' myself up with my own sense of humor.

With all the fill_in_the_blank for Dummies books available, I wonder if there is one on sleeping. I struggle with a minor thing called insomnia.

I don't get it. I'm sleeping, and then I start to come out of it just a little. Suddenly some bored neurons decide to run a drill with the axons and dendrites, and the next thing I know my synapses are firing on all eight cylinders about some inane thing.

Most folks think that there must be something that can be done to take advantage of this affliction. That's because they have never frickin' experienced it. Your brain is focusing on stupid things, not useful things. Like while I'm typing, my brain is actually wondering " why is his head tilted over to the side a little as he writes? It's not a natural position. There! His head is now tilted forward a little. Still, now he has to look at the screen from under his cro-magnon forehead." Meanwhile I have a schematic staring at me on the desk that could easily suck up the time my brain is spending on worrying about the alignment of my head and neck. Stupid brain (in my best Homer Simpson voice).



Walking Dead

Fridays are often a time of upset (minus one weekend per month). Annie goes to her mother's on weekends. It's a bit bittersweet. I miss her, but I also look forward to some isolation. This is strange, given that I live, for the most part, in isolation. But, in her absence there is no Blue's Clues, no Old Maid, no books with pictures... But, today I received a geek present. I got two books that I orderd for work, and it is sooooo cool: Fractal Geometry and Frontiers in Electromagnetics. We all have our little quirks.

Curled up by the nightstand light